Quoting Shayna -
When does it make sense to start snapping ultrasound pics of your uterus and sending out grainy black and white shots of what appears to be a slightly anemic sea monkey to your friends and family?As soon as the Mother to be wants to? Thankfully, most people will rejoice with the mother to be (exception being Shayna). Her friends and family will share in her happiness and smile every time they see one of her ultrasound pictures (exception being Shayna). They will lift anything heavier than a few pounds for her, so she doesn't overexert herself (exception being Shayna). They will ask if she needs anything to make her more comfortable (exception being Shayna). They will start planning her BABY shower (exception being Shayna). They will LOVE her AND her baby (exception being Shayna).
And yet, she is barely at the point in her pregnancy where she can even begin to find out whether or not her pregnancy is truly one that will mature into a fully formed human being, independent and capable of surviving outside of her body. What will she, or any one of the millions of other women who behave in the same way, announcing their children’s existence even before they attend their first prenatal doctor’s visit, if they find out that their pregnancy is not viable? That their potential children would have no quality of life? Can she still have an abortion if she has already so publicly and firmly turned her pregnancy, which is a medical condition that she herself has, into a separate human being in her own mind the mind of her friends and family members?I'm taking it that Shayna would prefer every baby aborted "just in case" something goes wrong? Only a pro-about would keep a calendar reminding her of the last possible day to abort "just in case" the baby's not perfect.
And yet, the baby-centric culture that we have created, wherein it is somehow bitter or radical for me, a single woman, to defend my right to my own body by belonging to the Abortion Gang, but normal for a pregnant woman to spam her entire e-mail address book with a flood of fetus photos. Sure, her job as an ultrasound tech means that my cousin is able to scan herself more often than a hairdresser changes her hair color, but she is hardly alone in transforming from a multifaceted woman into an obsessed baby bakery.It's called HAPPINESS Shayna! Something you clearly don't have any experience with.
I’m not sure whether I find the barrage of baby news and photos so obnoxious because it began upon conception or because of its sheer volume. It could be because, despite the fact that it is remarkably easy to conceive a child, her behavior indicates that it is somehow a daring or difficult choice.Actually, the chances of getting pregnant run between 11% and 25% each month, depending on the timing. While some women get pregnant easily, others struggle for years, and some never get pregnant. They never experience the joy of carrying their baby in their womb, feeling it kick, and giving birth. They feel like they were cheated, and unworthy. They go through years of depression because they feel that their destiny is unfulfilled. So sad that Shayna has no empathy for these women. But who says feminists should care for all women? Not me.
Yet, I believe, that it is so much more challenging and admirable to make the decision to not have a baby. To dare to put quality of life above “life,” to make the hard decisions that, unfortunately, no one will be sending you cute little pastel care packages for. It is so much more difficult to decide to have an abortion, to decide that you cannot have a child now, because, unlike the decision to have a child, there is no one there to pat you on the back, let alone legions of family, friends and acquaintances. As Mother’s Day approaches, though, if you are one of these courageous women, then please pat yourself on the back. Whether you have children now or not, know that you decision mattered, and that you deserve to be praised every bit as much as and more than those who decided to carry pregnancies to term.I'm picturing Shayna walking out of the abortion mill after having her baby forcefully removed from her womb. All the other pro-aborts are high fiving her, and yes, patting her on the back. You were so brave! Another baby saved from a world that's just scary to live in. Shayna goes back to her place, alone.
At the same time, her cousin went to the hospital. All of her family is there waiting outside the door to her room (exception being Shayna), and then they hear it. The baby cries, it's such a joyful sound. Everyone cheers. Happy tears flow, and hugs all around. A day or two later, the new mom is holding her baby as she is wheeled out of the hospital. There are balloons and flowers. She goes home and puts her newborn in it's bassinet for the first time. And she sits for hours, just watching her baby sleep. LIFE is beautiful.
It's sad the Shayna will never experience the joys of pregnancy and motherhood, or maybe it's not.